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Hang Seng 21,587 +381.76
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Shanghai
3,134 +11.76
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India NSE 5,872 +66.76
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Matterhorn Endowment
He is believed to be the leader in penis-size to wealth ratio (ala crazy/hot scale)
with Lorenzo 3 inches ahead of other prominent billionaires.
See how he matches up.
The Family Jewels:
One year at the annual International VMIIUGI masquerade at Kensington Palace, Elizabeth the II
accidentally dropped her earring down a mysterious shaft, never to be seen again. Luckily, my cuff
links were an almost identical marquise diamond cut and I was happy to loan them to her for the evening.
She never looked better. Next thing I know, BOOM, knighted! But, I am not into labels so need to call me
Sir Lorenzo Von Matterhorn, although that is "technically" my name now.
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LORENZO VON MATTERHORN
Von Matterhorn Industries International Unlimited Global Inc. |
Lorenzo Von Matterhorn, accomplished Jai Alai champion
and beloved opera singer, founded VMIIUGI in 1997, with
one simple mission statement: to apply the values of synergy and human capital to business ventures and other
fiduciary instruments as guidelines of the building blocks
of corporate foundation as per ventures incorporated and
such as.
Now a huge multi-national corporation, VMIIUGI is so big
it's like maybe Von Matterhorn is a bad guy from a James
Bond movie, except he's totally sweet and all of his body
parts work normally.(Some of them above average. What
up.) But he's not a bad guy. I mean, he's a little bad, drives
a motorcycle, that kind of thing, but just the right amount of
bad where he's not boring and maybe the right girl could
turn him into a real catch. Boyfriend material, if we're being
honest. But she'd have to be something really special. Like
36C at least.
Von Matterhorn is an industry leader in the manufacture of
cute shoes, walk-in closets, chocolate, ponies, chocolate
ponies, and female orgasms. |

Von Matterhorn, reclusive billionaire
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